Introduction

• This deeply moving story emerges from the ashes of a tragic ending ... loss from family suicide, profound grief, unresolved spiritual questions, a realistic appraisal of an addictive culture, and even the greatest life mysteries ... a brilliant, timeless memoir by an author who cares deeply about humanity, the universal struggle to find peace within chaos and discord. A poignant, courageous narrative; a book for all seasons that forges lasting bonds of connection and understanding; a determined and inspired spiritual journey.    

" ... a new path. Holy and beautiful and heartbreaking."
   --Susan Hall Pohlman, author of Halfway to Each Other

The Silence of Morning, a compelling story of life and loss, culture and society, reveals why the author, in the face of her son's loss, decides to confront the mysteries of existence. For one thing, as a spiritual thinker with a sociological bent, Hickman's looking for the universal message ... a path through the wilderness that speaks to every living soul. But the author also seeks safe, even fruitful, passage through the throes of intense grief. 

In deciding that her son's suicide at 27 is a mystifying, but forceful, catalyst for spiritual growth, the author also accepts an unspoken challenge to unearth the deeper story, the universal message, so others can benefit. Her son's struggle to find meaning and purpose in a chaotic world that serves up escape, excitement, and excess as "solutions," also leads the author to question the viability of a contemporary culture that points so many in the wrong direction.

Do we understand the role of addiction in society, or why this age-old problem assumes an endless variety of destructive, life-threatening forms? Stepping beyond the personal dimension--we are a world born of connection--the author considers the profound influence of culture and society, noting the existence of a rather toxic climate of addiction.

Beautifully articulating life challenges faced by nearly every family, every individual, this insightful author shines a bright and compassionate light on the vagaries of the human condition -- addictive culture (the many forms of addiction found in every community, all societies), family loss from suicide, surviving grief and loss, spiritual exploration and realization, the insidious nature of time. Ultimately, however, the author chooses love over despair.

• "An unforgettable meditation on life and death and the powerful role love plays in attaining spiritual freedom."  --Matthew Peters, Ph.D., author

Unprepared for the fierce, complicated demands of loss, Hickman wonders who would be prepared. Would a saint be prepared, someone braver than I, perhaps, or someone who moved on with a heavy shrug of the shoulders, a fierce sigh, a wistful expression?

• "Examining the world with narrative grace and balance, Hickman's autho­rial voice communicates the choppy stuff of life with elegance." --Jen Knox, author of After the Gazebo

Each and every life is a reflection of the mysteries we are all born into. Mysteries lodged in silence. And ambiguity. Yet this fascinating memoir manages to penetrate that silence, as the author initially survives its fierce echo in the face of her son's sudden death, and then realizes she must, one day, embrace it. 

And though every ending is a beginning, finding an illuminating thread when "grief is at the wheel" is a daunting challenge. "Like a prairie windmill silenced by time, life felt heavy and still." So how does the author navigate an agonizing maze of sorrow so that her tentative steps feel true to the moment? Why does she insist on the long view, instead of succumbing to generic cultural standards of moving on or getting over it?

Despite a crushing loss ... here we have a warmth of spirit, understanding and compassion in a distancing world. --Madeline Sharples, author of Leaving the Hall Light On

Cover art by artist Paul C. Jackson, Columbia, MO.

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