Introduction

Of the 2,700,000 Americans who served in Vietnam, likely about 250,000 were gay or bisexual and approximately 4,500 of those were KIA, though no records were kept. This novel is dedicated to them, along with all the other soldiers, sailors, marines, and air force personnel who died there, or brought home the trauma.

In 1968, John Reese and Ian Alexander fall in love after barely surviving the overrunning of their firebase by the North Vietnamese. Reese is falling apart, both from PTSD and fear of exposure, while Ian supports him.

Their relationship is an open secret to their squad, some of whom accept it and others recoil. But Doc, Thumper, and Burd have more important issues: survival. Burd hides his homophobia. Doc has his own issues with religion. Thumper’s overwhelmed with combat, as well as with being a Black soldier in a white-led Army.

Just before Tet, leave is abruptly cancelled for a Phoenix mission to kidnap a village official thought to be a communist operative. In charge will be Captain Heinrick, a student of Asian culture with a traumatic secret: his Vietnamese wife and son were murdered by the VC. Heinrick changes the mission to assassination, which challenges each soldier to decide what is acceptable in war. When he strangles a prisoner, Alexander confronts him. Reese wavers between following orders and defending his lover.

Running headlong into several NVA regiments, the squad faces annihilation in a massive firefight. As they near their target, Heinrick orders a civilian killed to protect their approach. The squad must warn their base of the NVA incursion, and complete the original mission. But Ian, John, and the Captain will clash in a disastrous confrontation as the squad calls on all their skill and courage to try to escape.

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Excerpt

Chapter 3
Fort Benning

Ian checked his face in the latrine mirror and glanced at a guy strolling out of the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist. He quickly looked back to the mirror. All was quiet in the sleeping area of his two-story barracks. It was a Sunday, and most of his fellow soldiers were either snoring in their beds or with the chaplain at the little clapboard building the Army called the church. The First Sergeant had made a pitch at Saturday formation for everyone to go because “Chaplain’s been on my ass like a fucking tick at a picnic. Every fucking buddy will go to the goddamn church!” But church call was the last place Ian wanted to be, with what religion taught about people like him. He could get away with skipping it now he’d graduated from Ranger School and was just awaiting orders in a transit status. ... view entire excerpt...

Discussion Questions

From the author:

1. Should LGBTQ people, men and women, serve in direct combat roles during war?

2. Did Alexander and Reese's love for each other weaken the squad or strengthen it to complete it's mission?

3. Did Reese's sexual orientation and society's attitudes contribute to his PTSD? 4. Do you think Captain Heinrick's sexuality played any part in his decisionmaking and the way he commanded the squad? What was his sexual orientation?

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