Introduction

The activist and TED speaker Megan Phelps-Roper reveals her life growing up in the most hated family in America

At the age of five, Megan Phelps-Roper began protesting homosexuality and other alleged vices alongside fellow members of the Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, Kansas. Founded by her grandfather and consisting almost entirely of her extended family, the tiny group would gain worldwide notoriety for its pickets at military funerals and celebrations of death and tragedy. As Phelps-Roper grew up, she saw that church members were close companions and accomplished debaters, applying the logic of predestination and the language of the King James Bible to everyday life with aplomb?which, as the church’s Twitter spokeswoman, she learned to do with great skill. Soon, however, dialogue on Twitter caused her to begin doubting the church’s leaders and message: If humans were sinful and fallible, how could the church itself be so confident about its beliefs? As she digitally jousted with critics, she started to wonder if sometimes they had a point?and then she began exchanging messages with a man who would help change her life.

A gripping memoir of escaping extremism and falling in love, Unfollow relates Phelps-Roper’s moral awakening, her departure from the church, and how she exchanged the absolutes she grew up with for new forms of warmth and community. Rich with suspense and thoughtful reflection, Phelps-Roper’s life story exposes the dangers of black-and-white thinking and the need for true humility in a time of angry polarization.

Editorial Review

An Amazon Best Book of October 2019: Megan Phelps-Roper grew up in the church founded by her grandfather. The Westboro Baptist Church gained global notoriety for its in-your-face gospel of righteousness and hatred emblazoned on picket signs and shouted by protestors. Targets of Westboro Baptist included the LGBTQ community and even deceased American soldiers as church members picketed, taunted, and generally stoked the flames of outrage wherever they showed up. Unfollow is the unflinching memoir of a young woman who grew up in the teachings and activities of this church, but as a young adult, she started to see things differently, and ultimately made the decision to leave the church. It’s hard to look at the cruel, shameless actions church members—including the author—took in the name of their beliefs and to attract attention, but the raw candor with which Phelps-Roper shares her account is nothing short of remarkable. Twitter was the unexpected source that led to Phelps-Roper’s awakening to the cracks in her church’s ideology, and when she began to seek answers to questions she had never wanted to ask, there were many—including the man she would eventually marry, and those she had condemned—who treated her kindness and empathy. Unfollow is an inspiring account of a woman who had the courage to untangle the beliefs her life was based on, choose differently, and share her story with the rest of us. --Seira Wilson

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