Annie and Graham seem to have the perfect marriage. They enjoy each other’s company, have great sex and complement each other’s lifestyles. Graham is the ebullient and charismatic owner of the bookstore where they met, and she is a photographer. He interacts well with people, and she likes to observe them. It is Graham’s second marriage and Annie’s first. They have one child together, Sarah. He has one son from his first marriage, Lucas. Graham’s first marriage ended because of his infidelity. Like his size, his demands were often too large to be satisfied appropriately. He was a good father but not such a loyal, good husband. Still he has remained on good terms with Frieda, his ex, and the two families have blended so well together, that Annie and Frieda are great friends.
The novel examines several different kinds of loving relationships and child-rearing styles. Whatever touches the human condition, like aspirations, hopes and dreams, sibling rivalry, infidelity, sexuality, secrets, creativity, rebellion, fear, and even subtle allusions to some political beliefs, as certain names are sprinkled throughout the book, like Obama, McCain, and Palin, are all worked together, to produce an insightful novel about the lives and lifestyles of “everyman” and ”everywoman”, if I may be so bold as to refer to gender. The novel explores these relationships in great detail, from their birth to their end, through natural and unnatural progressions. In some cases divorce rears its head, in some cases illness creates chaos, and in some cases, alternate life styles interfere with what was once a happy family. Often, our perceptions of what is, have nothing to do with reality and we make judgments based on false assumptions or emotions rather than intellect. The novel explores the disappointments, secrets, betrayals, and grief that a marriage could be wont to, that some couples are bound to encounter or experience over their decades of marriage, as well as their joys and celebrations.
On the whole, while the novel is engaging, it is not uplifting. As it explores the complications that come with aging, as we visit our memories and our memory loss, as our friendships new and old dissolve, our misunderstandings and our petty differences enrage, as we conduct business and experience pleasure together and alone, the passage of time, with all the encumbrances it brings to our changing relationships as loved ones are lost to us, is well illustrated and often sadly defined. I wondered, at the end, do most of us feel like outsiders, at one time or another? Do we all have to work out how to feel included and comfortable with ourselves, alone, and not always with a partner, regardless of the circumstances? Do some people simply possess that skill of fitting in, while some of us simply always feel we do not?
The author reads her own novel well, which is not always the case, but the narrative frequently gets bogged down as the reader/listener is suddenly shocked with referrals to the sex act or parts of the human body that are unnecessarily crude, or to other natural events with inappropriate references. Why use the expression dog “piss”, when a more polite form of expression is available, or “shitty” diapers when you could say soiled? Such use of language was unexpected and distracting as it took “realistic” a bit too far and was not representative of the work of this fine author.