Sandwich, Catherine Newman, author; Nan McNamara, narrator
The novel is both heartwarming and witty, even when it illustrates the daily traumas that humans must face with family and friends. It is about a family that returns to the Cape Cod town of Sandwich. They return to the same house they have rented for their week of vacation every summer for many years. The children are now adults, and the nest at home is empty.
The house they rent is simple. It has only one bathroom plus an outdoor shower to serve the needs of all of the seven guests that will eventually be there together. This kind of coziness encourages togetherness and compromise.
This family may or may not be typical of yours, but the issues that arise are surely issues all readers will be familiar with at some point in their lives. There will be so many “aha” moments. As the parents watch their children grow up, they suffer from separation anxiety. Both the father and the mother suffer differently, as they witness the decline of their elderly parents and the incline of their children’s lives. They deal with it in different ways and to different degrees. Women are more emotional and closely attached to the children, men remain more distant and less intense in their responses.
As many of us watch our children grow up and gain independence at the same time that our parents lose theirs, we must care for both sides of that sandwich. In this book, it is a pleasure to read about how they resolve all of the conflicts with which they are faced. Although there is tension, the problems are dealt with in such a way that they are not really problems, but instead, simply situations that need to be resolved, and resolved they are, with the most positive face on it.
Everyone has a unique personality that develops in different directions. Different partners and friends are chosen that we may or may not identify with, but we watch as the choices are dealt with maturely and kindly, without rancor and with all of the interested parties becoming satisfied with the results. As we watch the young experience their growing pains, it is often filled with laugh out loud moments. As we watch the elderly parents basically stop growing and settle into a routine of life that is simpler, more disciplined and less taxing, it is often filled with tearful moments. We will all surely identify with some stage of life that the characters are experiencing.
The everyday concerns that a family has to deal with are dealt with very authentically by this author, if not with a bit too much understanding, and a bit too much of a focus on progressive policies, at times. All of the characters, even those with flaws, seem too well adjusted, even those with anxiety disorders seem to grow more rational in their responses than one would expect, as they always accept whatever comes their way in what would be the perfect response. Though Rocky (Rachel), has had her trials and tribulations, her secrets and betrayals, she is coming to terms with them. David is the perfect opposite of the toxic male, which often disturbs Rocky because she wants more engagement from him than he can provide. So while she doesn’t want a man to be toxic, she also doesn’t want him to be placid.
Willa is an overly “woke” teenager who is presented as a bit younger than her real age. She often seems naïve and obsessed with liberal points of view, but in all situations, her beliefs are handled with an open mind and a broad interpretation, so that there is room for disagreement on all sides of the issue of the moment, whether it be gender, pronouns, word usage, or climate change. When Willa announces she is gay, there is no shock or surprise. It is simply a ho-hum moment of no big deal, with an aura about them that seems to say, oh, we already knew. When son James impregnates his childhood sweetheart, although both are very young and just starting out in life, there is no judgment and the issue of abortion is handled very quietly, showing both sides of the issue, covering the need for it, the trauma resulting from it, and the politics surrounding it, but it is not offensive. When a parent shows signs of illness, there is fear, but there is also anger because the illness had been a secret, instead of simply concern because the person is ill. We all act selfishly, at times, and feel put upon by others. The women are feminists, but with limitations.
The book is about reality but it is told with a bit of a surreal approach. It feels as if the author has dealt with every issue with almost too much dignity and compassion, but, on the other hand, wouldn’t it be nice if reality was so forgiving and kind in the way the author presents it?
She has honed in, with great insight, on the way our lives progress, from our childhood to our aging. She shows how relationships work or should work, between parent/child, sibling/sibling, father/son, mother/daughter, doctor/patient, etc., and explores the different ways that women deal with life differently than men, how differently parent and child view each situation, and how differently all perceive the same situation. It is laugh out loud, about parents, children, habits, modes of dress, husband/wife relationships, and even about the hot flashes of menopause that men will never understand. So, having spent summers at the Cape, in a town very close to Sandwich, I found this book calling my name. Being a woman who can identify with all stages of the lives of these characters, I found it compelling. The book will make you laugh and it will make you cry, but it will not disappoint you. The reader should be aware that this is a book directed at a female audience, that is for sure.