Introduction

"A beautiful tale of a vulnerable, compassionate woman who finds that, in order to care for others, she must also let herself be cared for." â??â??Kirkus (starred review)

Whatâ??s the point of giving someone a beautiful death if you canâ??t give yourself a beautiful life?

From the day she watched her kindergarten teacher drop dead during a dramatic telling of Peter Rabbit, Clover Brooks has felt a stronger connection with the dying than she has with the living. After the beloved grandfather who raised her dies alone while she is traveling, Clover becomes a death doula in New York City, dedicating her life to ushering people peacefully through their end-of-life process.

Clover spends so much time with the dying that she has no life of her own, until the final wishes of a feisty old woman send Clover on a trip across the country to uncover a forgotten love storyâ??â??and perhaps, her own happy ending. As she finds herself struggling to navigate the uncharted roads of romance and friendship, Clover is forced to examine what she really wants, and whether sheâ??ll have the courage to go after it.

Probing, clever, and hopeful, The Collected Regrets of Clover is perfect for readers of The Midnight Library and Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine as it turns the normally taboo subject of death into a reason to celebrate life.

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Excerpt

1


The first time I watched someone die, I was five.

Mr. Hyland, my kindergarten teacher, was a cheerful, tubby man whose shiny scalp and perfectly round face reminded me of the moon. One afternoon, my classmates and I sat cross-legged on the scratchy carpet in front of him, enthralled by his theatrical telling of Peter Rabbit. I remember how his meaty thighs spilled over the edges of the child-sized wooden chair he sat on. His cheeks were rosier than usual, but who could blame him for getting excited over a good Beatrix Potter plot? ... view entire excerpt...

Discussion Questions

From the publisher:

1. Clover believes that one of the reasons she has had trouble forging connections with others is because of her job as a death doula. Why do you think it’s socially unacceptable to discuss death as an inevitable experience we will all face? How is Western society different from others in this sense?

2. Sylvie is the first real friend her own age that Clover has as an adult. What does their friendship teach Clover about vulnerability? Discuss Clover’s evolution when it comes to opening herself up to human connection.

3. What effect do you think traveling and learning about various cultures’ perception of death has on Clover?

4. Sebastian mentions feeling “that Sunday school guilt,” worrying if he was “doing all the right things to get into heaven” (page 226). How has your upbringing, spirituality, or religion influenced the way you think about death?

5. “Someone told me once that [grief is] like a bag that you always carry—it starts out as a large suitcase, and as the years go by, it might reduce to the size of a purse, but you carry it forever . . . it helped me realize that I didn’t need to ever get over it completely” (page 254). How does it feel to consider grief as something you learn to deal with, rather than setting an end goal of ridding yourself of it? Has your perception of grief shifted at all after reading this novel?

6. “But the secret to a beautiful death is to live a beautiful life. Putting your heart out there. Letting it get broken. Taking chances. Making mistakes.” How important do you think it is to be “cautiously reckless” with your life? How do you plan to do so moving forward, if at all?

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